Posted: January 27th, 2004 | Author: | No Comments »


I didn’t know what to say about his writing. He was bothered by something that I had never experienced in that way. I still didn’t know what was exactly going on. A few more minutes of talking, and I realize that he’s been diagnosed with schizophrenia. He doesn’t think he has a problem himself. And I can understand that. No one wants to give in. Professional medical advice or not. We all like to think we’re perfectly fine. Denial is a good tool for all of us.
He still looks all around the room before he can get a sentence out. And he changes his position on the chair every minute or so. Later on, he admits he’s had a problem with alcohol and drugs. That he’s been through programs to help him with his problems. And I can only make a guess as to whether it’s been long since he got rid of his habits.
After this introduction, we talked about almost everything. He told me about his experiences and his history. How he has travelled all over the US. Sleeping where he can. Just living the nomad life. He seems like a very intelligent person. C has an interesting point of view on a lot of different issues. And having studied to be a journalist, I see that he has the critical view point of a journalist.

His visit was a nice reminder of the real world that exists outside the campus life. That people have to deal with more unbearable truths than me and most other students my age. Here I am completely immersed in something not too unlike a rate maze. I do a certain sequence of (somewhat) inconsequential tasks. I am rewarded for them and given a pellet, or degree. And in my four years I have not made much contribution to the society that welcomed me here. I’ve not made life any easier for people like my own neighbour! I would not have known of his problem had he not approached me. And really, how many “residents” of this city do I know?

C left after two hours. He had mentioned that he read and enjoyed a certain magazine. I happened to read that same publication a while back and had a few copies around the house. I lent him a copy. Not so I could feel better about anything. Just so there is an excuse for more interaction between the two of us.